Perturbed in multitudinous manners (notice me! I have a thesaurus!)


When nicoll suggested to read Grey in our MiniBookClub, my reaction was this:


but then I said to myself, “you’ve already read 50shades trilogy, how awful could it be!”

Big mistake.To say that the experience of reading (150ish pages of) Grey has moved me would be an understatement. My reading buddy mentions the reasons for this movement in her post.

I, however, will reflect on the “novel” through the many examples of ELJames using a thesaurus. So, fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride!

maladroit(nes)lacking in adroitness (duh); unskillful; awkward; bungling; tactles. 

This entire novel is written in such an awkward and unskillfull way that from time to time I had to re-read a paragraph because I didn’t have a single clue as to what I’d just read. At several times Grey is talking to a person and then you read his thoughts and you’re confused because you can’t say if he’d said the thoughts aloud or if they’re just part of his mental scenery.

adeptlyvery skilled; proficient; expert

I’ve noticed that ELJ has become an expert user of a thesaurus. In the 50shades trilogy her writing (and vocabulary) was pedestrian at best of times. This book at times reads like a scientific paper. The thing is, words like these have no place in an erotic novel, or any novel not set in Victorian UK. (there will be more examples of this as you continue reading)

Frisson: a sudden strong feeling of excitement or fear; a thrill.

Grey constantly feels a strong feeling of excitement at the thought of hurting Ana. Also there is his constant amazement at the fact that she likes him, and at the same time there is his constant noticing that the women around him are falling left right and center for him. He obviously can’t decide whether he’s lacking in self-esteem or he’s a narcissist. And this starts scaring the reader very early on (notice the fear in the definition).

Obsequious: obedient or attentive to an excessive or servile degree.

Now, what Grey is looking for in Ana is someone fitting the definition above. I’m not sure this is a very good thing. This is not the definition of a sub in a BDSM relationship (not according to all the expert critics of this whole saga).

Louche: disreputable or sordid in a rakish or appealing way.

Louche is what ELJ would use to describe Grey, but this can’t be further from the truth, at least not after reading his “thoughts” in this novel. Notice the “appealing” part of the definition. Well, Grey is not appealing, not unless you’re a sucker for Stockholm syndrome situations. What Grey is is a psycho who cares nothing for anyone’s wishes and who constantly ignores what Ana is telling him and acting in accordance with what he thinks she means (in case you are worried by this, you should be. This is the main excuse rapists all over the world use when defending themselves.)

Assuage: 1) make (an unpleasant feeling) less intense; 2) satisfy (an appetite or desire).

Although I was very much disturbed by Grey’s, this feeling was assuaged by ELJ’s inability to write a believable character. I mean, really! He mentions that he likes to keep changing his coffee order in the office because he wants to keep his employees guessing. (Ego trip anyone?)

Beguiling: charming or enchanting, often in a deceptive way.

ELJ obviously tried to write the character of Grey to fit into the above definition, but all she managed to do is to make Ana seem stupid for not seeing Grey for who he really is – a crazy person.

And the last thesaurus word is:

Profligate: 1) recklessly extravagant or wasteful in the use of resources; 2) licentious; dissolute.

Here, all I have to say is that the fact that this book has sold millions of paper copies is a disgraceful waste of trees. People, trees are important! They create oxygen and we can’t live without oxygen! Whereas we can live without an insight into the mind of a psycho like Grey (unless, as nicoll has suggested, this was turned into a thriller like the Red Dragon or something like that!)

My last thought for this (partly read) book is this – I am scared! Honestly,  I am. These types of books have a target audience that mainly consists of young (impressionable) girls/women/boys/men. And idolizing a man who is so obviously disturbed will most surely have serious consequences. Just imagine all the relationships where one partner is questioning the behavior of the other – after reading this book and seeing that that kind of behavior is considered “ok” and “hot” and “sexy” and “mysterious” – do you imagine they won’t be influenced?

Of course they will. They will suffer through abuse and call it love; they will cry and be hurt and call it “he/she had a terrible childhood”…

Now allow me to quote the Doctor when expressing my final opinion of this book


Enough of the serious themes because I’ve just made myself really really angry!

To make things funny again I’ll just leave this here just so you can see the proof of ELJ’s prowess at writing sex scenes:

"...her unbridled enthusiasm for sexual congress..."

and last but not least:





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